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#393529 01/31/17 09:37 AM
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Here's a song I wrote a while back. I finally had a friend of mine put vocals with it. I would really like some constructive criticism on the song, the mix, etc. Don't hold back as I know there is a lot of room for improvement. Thanks.

RealTracks in style: ~592:Bass, Acoustic Bluegrass Doc Ev 100
RealTracks in style: ~365:Guitar, Acoustic, Fingerpicking Ev 085
RealTracks in style: ~598:Guitar, Acoustic, Strumming Bluegrass Doc Ev 100
RealTracks in style: ~409:Fiddle, Background George Ev 085
RealTracks in style: ~599:Mandolin, Rhythm Bluegrass Doc Ev 100
RealTracks in style: 377:Guitar, Resonator, Background Trav Ev 088

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Loved this backtrack. Vocal was excellent. Song has an east coast feel to it. Very cool. Love the icon you are using for your profile. Is the John playing a banjo. Love it


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Really like it.

The thing I would take a look at is the word "go" at 0:48. It comes out almost like a plosive (usually on the letter "p"; however, all your "p's" seemed to come out fine). I would try to soften the "g" in the word "go" a little bit.

The lyric was "where on Sunday we would go".

Otherwise, sounds great and very old school southern gospel.


John

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Fiddle work is interesting, too

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Enjoyed it!

It sounds fine as is but if you want to get the feel of a real bluegrass band playing I'd consider adding some solo instruments. Use a solo fiddle for the intro and some fills and drop out the background fiddle at those points. Perhaps some mandolin fills fills while dropping out the mando chops at that point, etc. Also it's rare for a bluegrass band to all come in on the first beat of the first measure. You can regen the solo fiddle RT until it plays a couple of "pickup notes" before everybody else hits it or if you are mixing in a DAW you can comp in those notes. Meaning bluegrass bands don't typically count off and rarely have a drummer to "click" it off. Just a few observations from a guy who spent several decades playing upright bass looking at the backside of the rest of the bluegrass band! smile

Looking forward to more songs from you!

J&B



Last edited by Janice & Bud; 02/01/17 05:21 PM.

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Hi TLMelvin, Wonderful composition on this! the strings really bring a sentimental feeling to the whole piece. Great work, keep it up! smile


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Joe
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This song has a very enjoyable old time feel and your friend has done a fine job on the vocal ( harmonies on the chorus might add something and fit with the congregation/family theme).
I enjoyed the bluegrass band sound.

Robert

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Pretty song!! I like the melody and the arrangement. I think the vocal is a touch loud and dry. Otherwise, it all works well for me. Nice job!! Take care. Greg

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Thank you all for the input. I appreciate the advice and encouragement. Hopefully one day I'll have enough experience to pay it forward.

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TLMelvin, that track was wonderful, beautiful bluegrass. The vocal was clearly well above the music bed. The only thing I was wishing for that I didn't hear was some vocal harmony on the chorus. But that can always be added later. Very good!! Thanks, Torrey



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Thanks Torrey. I do plan to add harmonies to the track in the near future as well as other changes that were suggested. I visited your site and I must say that I am very impressed with your music. Very professional in every way. I really like your vocal style. I thought I may have detected some Lennon/McCartney influence. I also appreciate you're desire to glorify the Lord through your music. PTL!!

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Great song post - I'm a sucker for the Fiddle & Mandolin smile

Your friend has the perfect voice to sing this tune!

This is today's Hot Forum Topic!


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