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Thought I'd share latest song; Betta Fish which I had a lot of fun recording. I recorded it on Logic ProX and mastered it with Ozone11. As I did this all myself I am hoping to get some feedback on the mix levels and master I (and anything else you feel like commenting on) as it's currently just on Soundcloud and tweakable. Thanks Joe https://soundcloud.com/joseph-stroffolino/betta-fish?si=d28d1cbfe2d9482d9659ebd954c3ca66&utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharingBIB tracks RealTracks in style: ~683:Bass, Electric, PopHalfNotesPush Ev 120 RealTracks in style: ~405:Guitar, Acoustic, Strumming Ev 120 RealTracks in style: ~522:Guitar, Acoustic, Fingerpicking Ev 120 RealTracks in song: 1604:Fiddle, Background Pop16ths Ev 110 Drums: EzDrummer3 Keys: EZKeys2 Grand piano EZKeys2 MK1 electric piano DAW: Logic Pro X with a variety of Izotope Plug ins (Neutron 4 Neoverb and Ozone 11) Vocals Chain: Autotune Pro Autotune Vocal Compressor Autotune EQ Isotope De-ess
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Hi Joe. There is a lot going on here and the fun you are having comes over. It's hard to distinguish the lyrics in places though. You could try taking the piano and one of the other instruments down a couple of db and maybe the doubled vocal too. Then again, maybe that's how you want it to sound. What do I know?  Vic
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Vic, Thanks for listening and thanks for the helpful comments.
Joe
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Hey, that IS a lot of fun! Very catchy little tune. Love the vocal arrangement and the way the middle eight backs out of the I-VI-II-V before diving back in. I even like the key signature (C#?). Well done!
DC Ron
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Joe, This is the first tune of yours I've heard and I enjoyed it! You have a great voice and I feel your performance here was excellent! I tried to give a like on SC this morning, but it wouldn't let me for some reason One thing that caught my attention was the drum pattern chosen. This is just my preference, but it might be worth trying a pattern where the kick drum doesn't have the double hit on the syncopated 3. I think a single hit would make the rhythm tight and flow better. But that's just my taste and may not be what you like! Carry on and keep up the great work! T
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This is a strange (in a positive sense) and catchy song.
I like it.
I won't comment on the mix/master yet because there are some issues with the arrangement that first need to be ironed out.
As catchy as your song is, you overwhelm the listener with information, there's just too much going on, everything is fighting for attention.
I would start again with just the vocals, the bass, the drums and one of the guitars.
Try to make that sound good.
Priority one get your vocals.
Then add one instrument at a time and only keep it if you think the song sounds significantly better. Check again to make sure the new instrument doesn't clash with the rest.
Rinse and repeat.
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Really appreciate the comments. I will definitely dig into this a bit and see what I can do.
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Really, really appreciate the comments.
It’s great to get this kind of feedback. I am definitely not a drummer and this really helps.
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Joe,
Love this. Great vocal and mix. The song is very cool. New and fresh!
Bob
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Hi, Joe. My first thought was of the picture: two betta fish in the same tank? That won't end well. But you explicitly mention they're females in the lyrics, so...  This has a of Barnes and Barnes sound - yeah, I'm thinking of "Fish Heads" here - in the best sense. In some ways, the song is bit of a mess with the overlapping vocals. On the other hand... well, it's a glorious mess that fits the song. Sorry, I had too much fun listening to this to give useful feedback.  Edit: My daughter had a listen, and gives it two thumbs up. "This is the kind of stuff you should be writing." she told me. 
Last edited by dcuny; 11/07/23 05:11 PM. Reason: My daughter heartily aopproves.
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Really appreciate the listen. I did go a little bit crazy on the vocals. I am constantly having to reign myself in as I tend to want to sing like bull in a china shop. Glad your daughter liked the song. In all honesty I should probably mention that the betta fish got along really well for a few weeks and then one of the fish turned on the other one and they had to be separated. But for the purposes of the song, I wanted to have them living in harmony. Thanks. Joe
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You've received some excellent feedback on the production so we won't be redundant. Like Bob said "new and fresh." We were delighted to read on the SC comments that it got two fins up from the fish! We enjoyed it and would only add that it would be nice to see the lyrics either here or on SC. Hope to see more from you! J&B
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Thanks for listening. I think I will add the lyrics to SoundCloud. That’s a great idea. Love your stuff too.
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Very creative. You are definitely having a good time with this! Good singing. I was a bit disappointed that it faded out. I was expecting an ending.
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Joe,
Fun, good spirited tune dedicated to your aquatic friends. Well composed & performed. Thank you for sharing.
Misha.
P.S. I have a large pleco that lived with us for good 8 years now. I tried introducing "friends", but didn't go well. He prefers solitude.
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Joe,
Fun song with a quirky lyric . . . good sound on the mix. I think the vocal sits right where it should for the feel of the song. The BGVs are well-balanced (maybe a bit strong initially, but that may be just because it was unexpected . . . but felt right thereafter). I liked it! Good stuff, Joe!
All my best,
Deej
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Thanks. Really appreciate the comment and the specific comment about the BGV. I may play around with fading them in a bit. I have been making some tweaks since I first posted the song. I ended up using the logic pro x mastering assistant for the most recent version and I’m liking it better than my previous Ozone 11 master. Thanks for listening.
Joe
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Joe, is the finished or only the betta version Sorry, I just couldn't resist! To be honest I loved the song as it is now! I reminded me of tamed down Captain Beefheart and his Magic Band, i.e. the album Trout Mask Replica. I mean that in a good way. Loved it.
Have you ever noticed there are no lines to a bathroom at a water park?
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Could be a more than a little They Might Be Giants about this.
The sound is better when the doubled vocal is missing or pulled down.
Sometimes I wished there was some slight variation to the phrasing but that's just me.
...a little more work on the mix and it'll be funny, weird & cool.
Last edited by rayc; 11/16/23 01:13 AM.
Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
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Hi Joe.
This is great!
It's very easy to hear you had heaps of fun putting it together.
You have a great sense of arrangement in addition to a fine ability to create a fantastic production. This will take you far!
I thoroughly enjoyed my listen.
--Noel
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