Originally Posted By: ROG
Hi Noel,

Great song with a wonderful period feel to it.

Yes, I did read the PDF after listening to the track and found it both fascinating and bewildering. I'm full of admiration for the amount of detail which went into these lyrics - my own method is very much the antithesis of yours.

One thing which I did notice is that the chorus appears to be blank verse, that is, it has no rhyming scheme at all. What struck me as strange is that I didn't notice it whilst listening to the song, only when reading the lyric sheet.

Thanks for providing so much detail - I'm always interested in other people's methods.

ROG.


Hi ROG,

I'm glad you found the pdf worth the read. As I said in the document, it was only going to be a couple of pages long to begin with but then, as I wrote it, more information seemed relevant so I included it.

Thank you for the feedback. I always value your perspective. Especially so since I found this song quite a challenge to mix. In the end, I simply decided to draw the metaphorical line under it and say "done".

Regarding the bridge section, the reason you didn't hear blank verse when you listened was because there is some assonance happening at key locations. These locations are rain/away and shine/sky. Because I wrote the lyric as the phrases that I sang, this assonance is not obvious. When I write this section as couplets, though, it becomes a little clearer. That is...

Quote:
If it's stormy, and it pours with rain
I'll be a rainbow and push the gloom away
And if it's dark, because the sun forgot to shine
I'll be a sunbeam, and I will decorate the sky


Pat Pattison calls rain/away and shine/sky subtractive rhymes because the syllable that completes the rhyme is one sound short of the syllable that starts the rhyme. In my case, and in both instances, the 'n' is missing from the second rhyming syllable. You've got mighty good ears to have picked this up! I'm impressed.

All the best,
Noel

P.S. I envy you being able to write good songs so easily. My method must seem very convoluted by comparison smile




MY SONGS...
Audiophile BIAB 2024