Previous Thread
Index
Next Thread
Print Thread
Go To
Page 1 of 2 1 2
#535030 05/01/19 10:24 AM
User Showcase
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,175
Veteran
OP Offline
Veteran
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,175

https://soundcloud.com/user-770148857/okay


Here's a new song, tried to do one like Marshall Crenshaw.

Vocals for my songs are almost always by a collaborator, usually from fiverr. I only sing on novelty songs and maybe a blues tune but it usually ain't real good.

bass: 683 guitars: 997, 1259, 2685


Okay...Okay-ay
I never really felt okay in this world,
Til the day... the day-ay
I looked up and you were there
And the way...the way-ay (yeah the way)
That you looked back at me,
It was such, such an inviting stare

And the things I see in you and me
Have opened my eyes wide
I just gotta tell you how I feel inside

Any time I get to feeling blue the thought of you gets me through the day,
Every time I look at you I think that I might be okay

Okay, okay-ay
It's been awhile and we're still intact,
I can say...yeah say-ay
I'm in love and that's a fact
And today...today-ay (yeah, today)
Is one that I'll never forget
Cuz you said, you said you love me back

Repeat chorus

Last edited by TuneMonger; 05/03/19 03:10 PM.

Windows 10, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 6i6, Komplete keyboard, Sony Acid Music Studio 11, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
TuneMonger #535040 05/01/19 11:56 AM
User Showcase
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 1,362
W
Expert
Offline
Expert
W
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 1,362
Hi TuneMonger,

That is a nice song. I enjoyed listening to it. You have a good voice that is pleasant to listen to.

I am curious about the part of the lyrics where you sing "... and we're still intact". English is not my native language so please bear with me if this is a stupid question, but is that a normal expression in English?
In my language "intact" is used about material things which are not broken (like glass, etc.), but never about relationships. Is it normal to use this expression in English about a personal relationship or is it your (clever) invention for this song?

Thanks a lot for sharing!
Will

TuneMonger #535054 05/01/19 01:09 PM
User Showcase
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,615
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,615
I really enjoyed the harmonies in this. Good production on a great catchy tune.
Reminded me of Crowded house. Rob

TuneMonger #535055 05/01/19 01:10 PM
User Showcase
Joined: Jun 2017
Posts: 2,946
PG Music Staff
Offline
PG Music Staff
Joined: Jun 2017
Posts: 2,946
The lyrics for this song were quite charming and I liked the catchiness of the tune. Thanks for sharing.


Cheers,
Ember
TuneMonger #535071 05/01/19 03:10 PM
User Showcase
Joined: Mar 2018
Posts: 6,025
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
Joined: Mar 2018
Posts: 6,025
TuneMonger,
Very cool song! Lyrics and melody grabs you right in.
Production and mix are done very tastefully.
Very curious of the mic that was used on this tune. If it is not a trade secret, can you please share?

Thank you for posting!

Misha.

Will Josef #535074 05/01/19 03:24 PM
User Showcase
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,175
Veteran
OP Offline
Veteran
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,175
Hi Will,

I was just being (hopefully) clever. I have never heard anyone use intact this way. Once upon a time, no one used 'tight' to describe a relationship, but look at the word now. Actually, I thought a long time about taking the word out, but ended up keeping it. I have taken a lot of creative writing classes, and a popular axiom in those classes is "kill your darlings." Which means to get rid of things like my use of intact. But I have a little bit of rebel in me, linguistically.


Windows 10, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 6i6, Komplete keyboard, Sony Acid Music Studio 11, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
TuneMonger #535081 05/01/19 08:22 PM
User Showcase
Joined: Aug 2018
Posts: 1,381
Expert
Offline
Expert
Joined: Aug 2018
Posts: 1,381
This is just great. Pleasantly poppy with an upbeat message too. Love the vocals and harmonies, both lifted to the next level with the additional production. Good attention to detail and possibilities.


BIAB 2021 Audiophile. Windows 10 64bit. Songwriter, lyricist, composer(?) loving all styles. Some pre-BIAB music from Farfetched Tangmo Band's first CD. https://alonetone.com/tangmo/playlists/close-to-the-ground
TuneMonger #535083 05/01/19 09:29 PM
User Showcase
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 7,853
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 7,853
Hello,

I have a few minutes to listen to two or three songs ... been driving my wife all over the State of Alabama for medical treatment. Glad I clicked onto this. I really like your voice ... and this lyric is really nice. I like the song a lot.

If I may, one quick observation ... I think if the drums were centered rather than panned somewhat left, it would "fill out' the mix a wee bit better. It's just a personal opinion. That said, this song is terrific! I had a great time listening to it. Sweet!

Best to you ...

Alan


BIAB 2024 Ultra Plus-all StylePaks*Win11*32GB DDR5*Rhyzen 9745x*AT 2035 Mic*Peavey Nashville 112 Amp*Ibanez ART120* Acoustic/Electric/Washburn D200S Acoustic*Stromberg Monterey Jazz Guitar

Loops: https://aldavidmusic.wixsite.com/bestmusicloops

TuneMonger #535097 05/01/19 11:01 PM
User Showcase
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 6,602
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 6,602
It's a nice combo of Crenshaw & Crowded House for sure.
The guitars chime nicely and the voice suits the song really well.
I don't think the asides work though - they sound tacked on and a little stiff.
I don't mind the use of "intact: at all - it does work as an opposite to broken and relationships may be intact grammatically.
I'm not fussed on the lines...
"That you looked back at me,
It was such, such an inviting stare" though, as they seem either predatory or jus awkward.
Cool song regardless of my quibbles.


Cheers
rayc
"What's so funny about peace, love & understanding?" - N.Lowe
TuneMonger #535115 05/02/19 02:40 AM
User Showcase
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 14,720
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 14,720
"This is just great. Pleasantly poppy with an upbeat message too. Love the vocals and harmonies, both lifted to the next level with the additional production. Good attention to detail and possibilities."

What he said!

A positive feel in lyric, vocal performance and arrangement. A nice shelter from news and social media of late.

We won't parse it out...suffice it to say that we enjoyed it in its totality.

Well done!

J&B


You can listen to our catalog on Apple Music or Spotify by searching on Janice Merritt
Our Videos are here on our website
TuneMonger #535132 05/02/19 05:24 AM
User Showcase
Joined: Jun 2000
Posts: 1,944
Jim Offline
Expert
Offline
Expert
Joined: Jun 2000
Posts: 1,944
A nicely done creative catchy tune here...
I especially liked the harmonies...
Really well done...
I like it!
Oh yeah... & I also liked the faded ending you gave the song.



Last edited by Jim; 05/02/19 05:26 AM. Reason: faded ending

Jim
†=☮&♥
TuneMonger #535157 05/02/19 09:49 AM
User Showcase
Joined: Jan 2016
Posts: 1,664
PG Music Staff
Offline
PG Music Staff
Joined: Jan 2016
Posts: 1,664
Hey there TuneMonger, fantastic choice of instrumentation on this. This sounds very full and the chord progression is very nice. Looking forward to hear more!


Cheers,
Joe
TuneMonger #535158 05/02/19 10:08 AM
User Showcase
Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 19,265
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 19,265
This is a very satisfying listen.

The vibe is very infectious (in a good way) and within seconds of starting to listen my feet were tapping up and down on the floor.

You've done a really good job with this. The production sits very comfortably on the ears. I also like the way that you've structured the lyrics. They flow along nicely and this flow marries the melody, its arrangement and lyric-content together very well indeed.

All the best,
Noel


MY SONGS...
Audiophile BIAB 2024
TuneMonger #535236 05/03/19 03:10 AM
User Showcase
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 7,742
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 7,742
Very nice song. Really liked your vocal. Well done


Scott Collingwood
https://soundcloud.com/scottt709
https://soundcloud.com/spiritlevel-ca
https://www.youtube.com/@SpiritLevel-ge3hm/
TuneMonger #535524 05/05/19 09:19 AM
User Showcase
Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 12,087
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 12,087
TM,

This is great pop music. A truly infectious melody. Catchy in the way that early Elvis Costello was - with a touch of The Knack or Badfinger. True ear candy. One of the catchiest, "pop-i-est", "radio-ish" songs I've ever heard on this forum.

This has "radio hit" written all over it (at least if we could turn back the clock a bit...).

fj

TuneMonger #535545 05/05/19 10:53 AM
User Showcase
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 6,992
G
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
G
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 6,992
Cool song!! Great retro feel! Arrangement and vocals really bring back a long gone wonderful musical era! I love the harmonies and the melody of the chorus...very creative and catchy! Very well done!! Take care. Greg

TuneMonger #535556 05/05/19 12:12 PM
User Showcase
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 1,926
D
Expert
Offline
Expert
D
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 1,926
TuneMonger,

Some terrific hooks in this and a really engaging melody and structure. Very easy on the ears, and locks you in from first to last note. From a production standpoint, for me at least, the “Yeah the way” and “yeah, today” back up vocals in the fifth line of each verse are a little too different sounding from the vibe of the song . . . might find a way to change the tone of that a bit to fit more snuggly. But that's a subjective thing . . . and it doesn't seem like anyone else was troubled by it--so lose or use as you see fit.

Loving the harmonies on the chorus. That’s really well done. Strong offering, Tune . . . I like it a lot.

All the best,

Deej

TuneMonger #535702 05/06/19 12:25 PM
User Showcase
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,175
Veteran
OP Offline
Veteran
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,175
Thanks to everyone who commented on this. I especially appreciate those who suggested ways to improve it. Lavish praise was also well received. ; ) I'm leaning toward removing the "yeah the way" and "yeah today" lines. So everyone was 'okay' with the ending? Thought I might get some nays on that. Thanks again to all, this is probably my first and last attempt at a pop song, I mainly like blues and roots stuff.

Last edited by TuneMonger; 05/06/19 12:26 PM.

Windows 10, Intel Core I5 10400, 16 gig ram, Scarlett 6i6, Komplete keyboard, Sony Acid Music Studio 11, BIAB 2020 UltraPlus Pak
TuneMonger #535879 05/07/19 12:25 PM
User Showcase
Joined: Jul 2015
Posts: 5,318
Veteran
Offline
Veteran
Joined: Jul 2015
Posts: 5,318
Hey TuneMonger, I loved the vibe in this one! That chorus is catchy (loved that change to a minor chord in there) Great job with the vocal harmony also! Thanks, Torrey




TuneMonger #535994 05/08/19 03:27 AM
User Showcase
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 3,414
PG Music Staff
Offline
PG Music Staff
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 3,414
What a tune! Your vocals absolutely soar on this one, and the harmonies are top notch. It's a solid earworm too - really catchy and displays a strong understanding of songwriting. I wouldn't bat an eyelash if I heard this on the radio.

Great work, and thanks for sharing smile


Cheers,
Deryk
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Go To
Page 1 of 2 1 2

Link Copied to Clipboard
ChatPG

Ask sales and support questions about Band-in-a-Box using natural language.

ChatPG's knowledge base includes the full Band-in-a-Box User Manual and sales information from the website.

PG Music News
Generate Lyrics for your Band-in-a-Box songs with LyricLab!

Need some lyrics to complete your Band-in-a-Box song? LyricLab is here to help!

LyricLab (by Joanne Cooper) is an AI-powered tool designed to quickly create lyrics and chords to fit your music. Just enter a rough idea of your lyrics, and let the AI bring them to life. Once you're happy with the results, simply import the LyricLab file into Band-in-a-Box® 2024 or newer. From there, you can pick your style and generate melodies to match your song’s chords!

Learn more about LyricLab here!

Watch the video.


Band-in-a-Box 2024 Italian for Mac is Here!

Ci siamo dati da fare e abbiamo aggiunto oltre 50 nuove funzionalità e una straordinaria raccolta di nuovi contenuti, tra cui 222 RealTracks, nuovi RealStyles, MIDI SuperTracks, Instrumental Studies, "Songs with Vocals" Artist Performance Sets, Playable RealTracks Set 3, Playable RealDrums Set 2, due nuovi set di "RealDrums Stems", XPro Styles PAK 6, Xtra Styles PAK 17 e altro ancora!

Tutti Pacchetti | Nuove Caratteristiche

Band-in-a-Box® 2024 German for Mac is Here!

Band-in-a-Box® 2024 für Mac Deutsch ist verfügbar!

Wir waren fleißig und haben über 50 neue Funktionen und eine erstaunliche Sammlung neuer Inhalte hinzugefügt, darunter 222 RealTracks, neue RealStyles, MIDI SuperTracks, Instrumental Studies, "Songs with Vocals" Artist Performance Sets, abspielbare RealTracks Set 3, abspielbare RealDrums Set 2, zwei neue Sets von "RealDrums Stems", XPro Styles PAK & 7, Xtra Styles PAK 17 & 18, und mehr!

Paket | Was ist Neu

Band-in-a-Box® 2024 French for Mac® is Here!

Band-in-a-Box® 2024 apporte plus de 50 fonctions nouvelles ainsi qu'une importante de contenus nouveaux à savoir : 222 RealTracks, des RealStyles nouveaux, des SuperTracks MIDI, des Etudes d'Instruments, des Prestations d'Artistes, des "Morceaux avec Choeurs", un Set 3 de Tracks Jouables, un Set 2 de RealDrums Jouables, deux nouveaux Sets de "RealDrums Stems", des Styles XPro PAK 6 & 7, des Xtra Styles PAK 17 & 18, et bien plus encore!

New! XPro Styles PAK 7 for Band-in-a-Box 2024 for Mac!

We've just released XPro Styles PAK 7 with 100 brand new RealStyles, plus 50 RealTracks and RealDrums that are sure to delight!

With XPro Styles PAK 7 you can expect 25 rock & pop, 25 jazz, and 25 country styles, as well as 25 of this year's wildcard genre: Celtic!

Here's a small sampling of what XPro Styles PAK 7 has to offer: energetic rock jigs, New Orleans funk, lilting jazz waltzes, fast Celtic punk, uptempo train beats, gritty grunge, intense jazz rock, groovy EDM, soulful R&B, soft singer-songwriter pop, country blues rock, and many more!

Special Pricing! Until September 30, 2024, all the XPro Styles PAKs 1 - 7 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea)! Supercharge your Band-in-a-Box 2024® with XPro Styles PAK 7! Order now!

Learn more and listen to demos of XPro Styles PAKs.

Watch the XPro Styles PAK 7 Overview & Styles Demos video.

XPro Styles PAKs require Band-in-a-Box® 2024 or higher and are compatible with ANY package, including the Pro, MegaPAK, UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, and Audiophile Edition.

New! Xtra Styles PAK 18 for Band-in-a-Box 2024 for Mac!

Xtra Styles PAK 18 for Band-in-a-Box version 2024 is here with 200 brand new styles to take for a spin!

Along with 50 new styles each for the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, we’ve put together a collection of styles using sounds from the SynthMaster plugin!

In this PAK you'll find: dubby reggae grooves, rootsy Americana, LA jazz pop, driving pop rock, mellow electronica, modern jazz fusion, spacey country ballads, Motown shuffles, energetic EDM, and plenty of synth heavy grooves! Xtra Style PAK 18 features these styles and many, many more!

Special Pricing! Until September 30, 2024, all the Xtra Styles PAKs 1 - 18 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea)! Expand your Band-in-a-Box 2024® library with Xtra Styles PAK 18! Order now!

Learn more and listen to demos of the Xtra Styles PAK 18 here.

Watch the Xtra Styles PAK 18 Overview & Styles Demos video.

Note: The Xtra Styles require the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition of Band-in-a-Box®. (Xtra Styles PAK 18 requires the 2024 UltraPAK/UltraPAK+/Audiophile Edition. They will not work with the Pro or MegaPAK version because they need the RealTracks from the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition.

New! Xtra Styles PAK 18 for Band-in-a-Box 2024 for Windows!

Xtra Styles PAK 18 for Band-in-a-Box version 2024 is here with 200 brand new styles to take for a spin!

Along with 50 new styles each for the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, we’ve put together a collection of styles using sounds from the SynthMaster plugin!

In this PAK you'll find: dubby reggae grooves, rootsy Americana, LA jazz pop, driving pop rock, mellow electronica, modern jazz fusion, spacey country ballads, Motown shuffles, energetic EDM, and plenty of synth heavy grooves! Xtra Style PAK 18 features these styles and many, many more!

Special Pricing! Until September 30, 2024, all the Xtra Styles PAKs 1 - 18 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea)! Expand your Band-in-a-Box 2024® library with Xtra Styles PAK 18! Order now!

Learn more and listen to demos of the Xtra Styles PAK 18 here.

Watch the Xtra Styles PAK 18 Overview & Styles Demos video.

Note: The Xtra Styles require the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition of Band-in-a-Box®. (Xtra Styles PAK 18 requires the 2024 UltraPAK/UltraPAK+/Audiophile Edition. They will not work with the Pro or MegaPAK version because they need the RealTracks from the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition.

Forum Statistics
Forums66
Topics82,951
Posts753,423
Members39,033
Most Online3,932
Nov 19th, 2024
Newest Members
Evilmaker, Andreu f, LukeB, Ind1ca, briankennedy
39,033 Registered Users
Top Posters(30 Days)
MarioD 139
jpettit 117
DC Ron 103
DrDan 103
dcuny 87
rsdean 81
vicarn 73
Today's Birthdays
Brian Hughes
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5