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Joined: Dec 2020
Posts: 40
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OP
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Joined: Dec 2020
Posts: 40 |
Hello fellow artists! Once more - and for the final time for now (else you will get fed up with me :-) ) - I am asking you to review my third song with BIAB "Queen of Hearts" on Soundcloud Let me know what's good and what you would have done differently. Queen of Hearts – Tina Jay
IntroVerse 1When – you try – to shut me out I hide Don’t you see me cry When – you try – to push me down I flinch You don’t notice why Verse 2When – you try – to limit me I shrink Wondering where to turn When – you try – to dominate I think Let our bridges burn Verse 3When – I hear – another of your lies It just makes me smile Don’t – you see – I’m a wonder in disguise You just wait a while…. ChorusI – am – the Queen of Hearts I – play – the major part I – am – the one that rocks I’m not – afraid to shock Watch – Me – Leave…. Instrumental (one verse length) Chorus x2I – am – the Queen of Hearts I – play – the major part I – am – the one that rocks I’m not – afraid to shock I – am – the one who’s strong I’m not – where I belong OutroWatch – Me – Leave – You – NOW…. I am still on the BIAB Pro Version and have used Audacity and Ozone 9 in addition on this rock track. Again, no tuning vocals (don't believe in it) and MIDI (will tackle next...). RealTracks in style: 1189:Bass, Electric, HardRockWaltz Ev 140 RealTracks in style: 860:Guitar, Electric, Rhythm HardRockWaltzSustainA-B Ev 140 RealTracks in style: 857:Guitar, Electric, Rhythm HardRockWaltzMutedA-B Ev 140 RealTracks in style: 854:Guitar, 12-String Acoustic, Rhythm RockWaltzA-B Ev 140 RealDrums [in Song:RockModernWaltz^5-a:Snare, Ride , b:Snare, Crash Ride I have also incorporated 2 harmonies (high/low) in the chorus; and vocal aahs in the Instrumental (Male/Female). Thank you!!
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Joined: Sep 2018
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Expert
Joined: Sep 2018
Posts: 1,362 |
Hello Tina,
I liked this song. The arrangement is clever and interesting and I actually got that feeling of increasing urgency you wanted to communicate through the song. Your vocal performance is fine and fits very well with the music.
I loved the transition to the piano in the end.
Overall a great production that was captivating and made me want to hear more of your music!
Thanks a lot for sharing!
Will
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Joined: Dec 2020
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OP
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Thanks Will, that's very encouraging and shows me to a degree that I am on the right track! Greetings to Denmark!
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Journeyman
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Journeyman
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 613 |
Hey Tina,
I like that I can hear the drums much better than the last one. The vocal seems a little hot to me, but that's just a personal preference. I'd like to suggest some stereo panning... I like to leave the drums & bass pretty much center, but then pan those guitars & other instruments left & right. Just experiment with how much (25%, 35%, 50%, 70%), also panning BV's (high right/low left) a little either side is effective.
Keep up the good work,
Greg
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Joined: Dec 2020
Posts: 40
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OP
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Joined: Dec 2020
Posts: 40 |
Yes, I wanted to make the guitars more prominent this time, the story called for it.
Re: panning: Two guitars are panned 20% each way, one is on zero (perhaps I should have panned too?) Piano on zero too...not sure if panning would have worked well there since it only appears as an intro and outro. Harmonies are panned 10% either side and BVs 20% either side. Could perhaps have been more accentuated?
food for thought!
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Lots to like about this. It is interesting and certainly delivers the intended message really well.
I especially like the lyrics, well written and projected.
BIAB & RB2024 Win.(Audiophile), Sonar Platinum, Cakewalk by Bandlab, Izotope Prod.Bundle, Roland RD-1000, Synthogy Ivory, Kontakt, Focusrite 18i20, KetronSD2, NS40M Monitors, Pioneer Active Monitors, AKG K271 Studio H'phones
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I like it.
I would suggest pan more, especially if they are stereo guitar tracks.
Vic
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