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#713055 04/12/22 02:17 PM
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Hi, all:

Here’s something new. I was recently reminded I hadn’t done anything soft and sad in a while . . . which seems to have been enough to prod me out of my song-writing slump. Thanks in advance for the listen and feedback. Hope you enjoy it!

Stay safe, stay well all—

Deej

Here's the song:

WHY DO YOU BREAK MY HEART

Here are the lyrics:

It’s the look in your eyes
The casual steps
The subliminal sighs
In your every breath
And the way they shade
Your every point of view

It’s the things that you say
The things that you don’t
The things that you do
And the things that you won’t
They speak to me
Like you never do

And I’ve tried so hard to give you all my love
Now I just don’t know what I was thinking of

Why do you break my heart
Baby, why do you pull my world apart
When all I ever do I do for you
Why do you always tear me down
When I finally feel we’re on solid ground
I find you running round with someone new

You say our love deserves a brand new start
But then you run, baby
Why do you break my heart

I should move right along
Leave you behind
But I’m just not that strong
It feels so unkind
Cause I know you need
Someone to lean upon

And I want be there
And it’s hard not to be
When I think that you care
More than you let me see
And I just don’t know
How free I’ll be if gone

And you always seem the storm I’m bracing for
So I wonder why I open up that door

And here's the band:

RealTracks 2475: Bass, Acoustic, HeldSimple
RealTracks 2914: Guitar, Acoustic, Fingerpicking Folky16thsBrent
RealTracks 1767: Piano, Acoustic, Rhythm Pop16
RealTracks 2337: Violin, Background, PopHigh
RealTracks 2785: Flute, Background CroonerBossa
RealTracks 2335: String Quartet, Rhythm PopHall

Last edited by Deej56; 04/13/22 05:44 AM.
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This is a sweet song... well written & performed.
Really nice arrangement and production.


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I absolutely love what you've done with the arrangement. It's serious and draws you in immediately.

I know that some people flinch from praise, etc. etc. etc. But this song is a masterpiece, and that must be said, I feel. Otherwise, what's the point, if we hide our light under a bushel all the time?

BRAVO. What musical storytelling abilities. There's nothing I can say here that praises this song enough, or articulates that praise for this song well enough to deservedly fit it - if that makes sense. I'd say that you're a genius, but then either you wouldn't believe me or be modest about it :-)

I want to hear this again and again. I may come back with even more to say (ha!), once I've had a few more listens. But the first thing that strikes me now: the orchestration. Its (seeming) simplicity and seriousness had me from beginning to end. Hats off to you - I mean this utterly and completely.

And to everyone else: this guy's a genius, and I have a feeling he's far too modest ;-))) Regardless, come on ... this song alone is top notch, right? Back me up here, lol ... please!!! :-)))

P.S. the lyrics.

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Lovely song, Deej!

Nice arrangement and melody, and man, your vocal gets me every time.

Well done!

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Deej,

A sweet sounding song (with a not-so-sweet story line).

A beautiful, heartfelt vocal.

Have to say, I don't care much for the bowed acoustic bass. It creates a drone-like muddy-ness to the production which almost hides the acoustic guitar and the high strings (and muddies the vocal a little).
I listened through speakers that have a lot of high-end clarity (Presonus E3.5) and then switched to earbuds (Apple) and had the same reaction with both.
Since neither Dave nor bloc-head made any mention of it, perhaps it's "just me".
And it is just an opinion, after all.

I like the song and love your vocal.

fj

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bloc, musician17, Dave and Floyd:

Thanks for the listen--appreciate the comments.

Floyd: Actually, I think you are right about the bowed bass. I had thought about switching it out mid-way through the process for the same reason you mention, and then in the mixing process I think I kinda got used to it and never did. I'm going to switch it out in the next iteration. Thanks for the suggestion!

EDIT: I switched out the bowed bass for RT2475 Acoustic, Held Bass, Simple. Sounds much cleaner, I think. Thanks Floyd!

My best to you all:

Deej

Last edited by Deej56; 04/13/22 05:43 AM.
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Very nice flow, sound and performance Deej.
My only sugg would be to pause in the chorus on "do" before "I do for you".

Vic

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Lyrically very strong song, especially the first verse creates enjoyable imagery.
Excellent beautiful melody and chord progression. The simple arrangement leaves room for your heartbreaking interpretation.

Janne


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Very sweet and enjoyable. At the moment I'm thinking something about the tone of the bass fits really well here, it sounds particularly gentle, if that makes any sense. Very well done.

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Hi, Deej.

I always enjoy your vocals, and this song is a lovely setting for them. Good singing as well - a no holds barred heartbreak song. Excellent write.

The mix feels a bit brittle on the top end, but otherwise well-defined. Then again, I'd trust anyone else's ears on the forum over mine! smile

I enjoyed listening! smile


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Nice one Deej,
excellent lyric.
There are some noises that need editing - some from your mouth but some from the acoustic guitar...often they're fine but a couple of string squeaks occur close to but not on a beat or are particularly loud.
The falsetto bits are a nice touch.


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rayc
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Dude,

You are the undisputed master of the gutwrenching, heartbreaking monster hit! You have done it again. Love it.

smile

If the title had not already been used I would say this is a Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius. smile

Ever read that??

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WOW this is absolutely fantastic

Love the violin crying in the background

Super vocal and outstanding lyrics

Great mix

Loved it

PS - I was going to say that I do not agree with Floyd about the bass until later on I read that you had swapped it out, smart move!


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Deej,

Great song - stunning vocal and phrasing. You have a real gift.

Bob

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Both beautiful and cool!
Different from what we've heard from you since we're back on the forum, but just as good.

Rob and Anne-Marie


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Lovely song Deej. The acoustic was so warm on the intro. Very cool backtrack. Vocal was sweet as well. Lyrics were excellent. So much emotion. Well done..


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I like the lyrics,
I like the music,
I like the phrasing,
I like the delivery,
I like the clarity,
I like the fact that the lyrics are understandable.

You have really put together a quality production. Nothing wrong with this perofrmance. Excellent effort.




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The RT’s chosen provide such a sweet, light touch for this sad song.

Your melancholy vocal delivers that heartbreak feeling so well.
We agree that the falsetto was very effective.

You definitely got over your writing slump with this one. smile

And, as anticipated, an excellent mix.

Well one!

J&B


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Deej...you "hoped we would enjoy"...well we did...this is a most excellent song but I don't think it would be quite as good as it was without your delivery of it...not to diminish in any way the quality of the song itself...so well written and phrased...its very cadence was filled with angst and heartache but your delivery of it put it over the top...yes, hope no more...we (speaking for all of us) absolutely enjoy it!


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Soft and sad, but a terrific break-out song, Deej. Your vocal is so good for this. Such good lyrics. The mix is smooth and with the instruments you chose so perfect for this one. Well written.


Enjoy whatever happens!
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