Log in to post
|
Print Thread |
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 3,970
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 3,970 |
Sad song and you have captured well the sadness in the lyrics, the melody and the arrangement. Maybe I was expecting to hear something broken, distortion on the synth or a heart-wrenching guitar solo, but those words speak enough for the fate that no-one deserves. Natalie has perfect sorrowful voice for the song, she actually fits most of your songs Great work with the backing vocals also. Excellent video! And quite creepy, those woman eyes really express the dying soul, and the woman in the end reminded me of Amy Winehouse... Janne
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Aug 2021
Posts: 21
Enthusiast
|
Enthusiast
Joined: Aug 2021
Posts: 21 |
This is a faithful description of an all-too-common condition - I too knew some-one. It's too good to let go by without a word or two about the metre and phrasing. It feels to me as though you settled too hurriedly on the way it scans, shoe-horning the lyric to fit where it doesn't quite feel comfortable, which then draws the listener away from the very deep message. Maybe re-visit the lyric also with this in mind - just as a suggestion, ignore if you wish - in the first line where you write 'down in your mind'- try " 'round, inside your mind' (which also works better I think with the idea of spinning a web) and adjust/shorten/squeeze the delivery to fit the metre - a couple of things like that. I reckon the BPM is perfect and the track is gorgeously sensitive with a great feel of mystery and pathos - you did very well there = warm regards, Nev
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856
Expert
|
OP
Expert
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856 |
You know I really love this one, BD. Reading your post was the first I learned that she is no longer with us. She would be happy with the love this song would bring her. This is such a good write. The lyrics, as you said can be interpreted differently depending on the listener's life experience, but when the reality of your friend is unveiled they can also be a war cry to abolish abuse of all kinds. It's amazing how good you're getting teaching Natalie to sing. Did I ever mention how good the production is? Thank you my friend, I really appreciate you taking the time to listen to the song again. The number of beers I owe you is getting alarmingly large...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: May 2018
Posts: 2,207
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: May 2018
Posts: 2,207 |
Wow.
Heartbreaking.
Well written, and Natalie's voice suits this song.
Bravo, in every way. Thank you so much for sharing it with us.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856
Expert
|
OP
Expert
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856 |
top quality all the way. Very nicely done. Thanks for listening and your nice feedback, Guitarhacker. BTW, did you notice that https://www.herbhartley.com/ is down?
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 21,812
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 21,812 |
BD this is one sad but powerful masterpiece. I think the tempo fits the song perfectly. You did a great job with Natalie however I would love to hear a female sing this with feeling. I think a human can add a lot of emotion to this song where as Natalie can't. Super mix.
When I was young I was poor. But after years of hard, honest, and painstaking work I am no longer young.
64 bit Win 10 Pro, the latest BiaB/RB, Roland Octa-Capture audio interface, a ton of software/hardware
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856
Expert
|
OP
Expert
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856 |
Wonderful song with a meaning. I love it all.
Vic Thank you for listening and your nice words, Vic. Highly appreciated!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856
Expert
|
OP
Expert
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856 |
Hi BD,
A wonderful song despite the theme of the lyrics. I think you did a great job making this song about this problem that is around us. I just read an article where some of those people, hounted by their own brain asked for euthanasia ('please help me to die'). Heavy stuff!
Your song was by itself wonderful. Natalie sings very, very good, with a nice vibrato in the vocals. The lyrics went through marrow and bone (as we in the Netherlands say). Do you say the same?
You did a very good job on this song, although I hope you don't have to make an other one... Hans
PS: the video was very impressing Thanks Hans for listening and your feedback on the song and video. I also read an article that said that the suicide rate is significantly higher for people who were abused in childhood. This is indeed heavy stuff. And, yes, here in Germany we also say "through marrow and bone", seems to have the same linguistic root.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: May 2015
Posts: 2,873
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: May 2015
Posts: 2,873 |
Hello B.D.,
It's a little ominous video, but I think the lyrics are accurately reflected. Memories of childhood abuse have a strong influence on the rest of life. I think it's very difficult to turn those motifs into a song, but you've succeeded. However, I still find it difficult to listen to such a painful song. Your AI synth vocal technique is amazing as always. Thank you for posting your precious song.
Best regards.
Shigeki Adachi
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 971
Expert
|
Expert
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 971 |
Professional. Top shelf all around. Terrific vocals and an excellent mix.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856
Expert
|
OP
Expert
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856 |
B.D.,
An Astoundingly Good lyric. Powerful. Blew me away.
Excellent tracks. Good mix.
This has a kind of Adele-vibe to it. (She could take this to the top of the charts - for a long run) Natalie sounds good, but at times she is "a bit too even". It is a lyric that deserves to be sung DRIPPING with emotion - I don't think Natalie pulls that off.
Would have like the chorus melody to go to a slightly different place (it has more of a "verse feel" than a "chorus feel".
Don't put too much thought into these "nits". I think this is an INCREDIBLE song. The lyrics are truly STUNNING.
Truly sorry for the loss of your friend. A tragedy.
fj Thanks, Floyd, for listening and for your feedback, especially on the lyrics, which are usually my weak point. I agree with you on both "nits". Those are the comments I learn from Now I just need to call Adele ... does anyone have her number?
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856
Expert
|
OP
Expert
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856 |
BD, I first read the lyrics and I thought how can you write a song that doesn’t rhyme? Well I guess you showed me how. A powerful message song that brings attention to a problem that too often is overlooked. Great work on the production and I continue to be impressed with your ability to make the singer work so well. All around impressive, Tom Thank you Tom for listening and your kind feedback, I really appreciate it. Rhymes are completely overrated!! (to be honest, I didn't even realize it until you brought it up).
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856
Expert
|
OP
Expert
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856 |
Haunting...both the song and video...there is no greater tragedy than being abused whether it's self imposed or imposed by others...beautiful song (melodically and lyrically)...the production of the music and video are top-notch...this is tragically beautiful if I may speak paradoxically...thanks! Thanks for listening and your feedback, firesong. I like the phrase "tragically beautiful". Added it to my lyric book
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856
Expert
|
OP
Expert
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856 |
Hi B.D. Very sad background story But also really brave to have such an emotional song sung by a synthesizer voice But the vocals sound pretty good all in all And lyrics don't always have to rhyme to be really good Your song proves that impressively Very good work Many greetings Andi ;-) Thank you, Andi, for your kind words. As I wrote above, I wasn't aware that there were no rhymes. Maybe it was even good that I didn't notice it....
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 5,602
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 5,602 |
Excellent production, deserving of all the prior accolades.
Really well done, lovely work of the Synth V vocal, and well written.
Excellent.
Peter
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856
Expert
|
OP
Expert
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856 |
Nice production Brain.
Thanks for posting.
Thanks for listening and your feedback, David. I always appreciate it!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 14,685
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 14,685 |
You’ve created a powerful video to accompany your excellent lyric. The first verse alone is heartbreaking and then the chorus begins with this:
“I can see the broken soul behind those empty eyes.”
Like so many folks, we’ve seen that look in the eyes of others and it is always incredibly sad.
The vocals sound great, as does the entire production.
Abuse, whether it is physical, mental, emotional or just neglect has a lifelong effect. Your song addresses the subject powerfully.
J&B
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: May 2014
Posts: 4,048
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: May 2014
Posts: 4,048 |
Very impressive song and video. Beautiful music and vocals. Yes, these things should be told about.
My granddad (born in 1898) was a choirboy in the catholic church when he was a child. He always referred to catholic priests etc. as "those dirty papists". He never told us what he meant by that and I didn't understand. Until... al these stories about abuse in the catholic church became clear. But he was long dead when this came out. So it's been of all times. It's good that people no longer hush up these things.
Anne-Marie
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 7,818
Veteran
|
Veteran
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 7,818 |
B.D.
Such a sad story. But you did a wonderful job turning it into a song, both lyrically and musically.
Natalie and her backup singers performed brilliantly - you have mastered her vocaloid performance.
Hopefully your friend in a great place and free of the pain and memories.
Alan
BIAB 2024 Ultra Plus-all StylePaks*Win11*32GB DDR5*Rhyzen 9745x*AT 2035 Mic*Peavey Nashville 112 Amp*Ibanez ART120* Acoustic/Electric/Washburn D200S Acoustic*Stromberg Monterey Jazz Guitar Loops: https://aldavidmusic.wixsite.com/bestmusicloops
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
User Showcase
|
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856
Expert
|
OP
Expert
Joined: Jul 2022
Posts: 1,856 |
B.D., this is a very good song done very well. I appreciate the personal strife you went through being there and hurting with, and for, your friend, putting all those feelings down in music, and the struggle in deciding to publish it. I have had the unfortunate opportunity of interacting with many similar victims in the past, and therefore have enough pictures in my mind already. For that reason I didn't watch the video, just listened to the song. It is very good and I agree with pretty much all Ray has to say above and appreciate the struggle you went through personally in developing and publishing this. Kudos.
Brad Thank you, Brad, for your kind feedback and especially for being able to relate to how hard it is to write and release a song like this.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ask sales and support questions about Band-in-a-Box using natural language.
ChatPG's knowledge base includes the full Band-in-a-Box User Manual and sales information from the website.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Band-in-a-Box 2024 Italian for Mac is Here!
Ci siamo dati da fare e abbiamo aggiunto oltre 50 nuove funzionalità e una straordinaria raccolta di nuovi contenuti, tra cui 222 RealTracks, nuovi RealStyles, MIDI SuperTracks, Instrumental Studies, "Songs with Vocals" Artist Performance Sets, Playable RealTracks Set 3, Playable RealDrums Set 2, due nuovi set di "RealDrums Stems", XPro Styles PAK 6, Xtra Styles PAK 17 e altro ancora!
Tutti Pacchetti | Nuove Caratteristiche
Band-in-a-Box® 2024 German for Mac is Here!
Band-in-a-Box® 2024 für Mac Deutsch ist verfügbar!
Wir waren fleißig und haben über 50 neue Funktionen und eine erstaunliche Sammlung neuer Inhalte hinzugefügt, darunter 222 RealTracks, neue RealStyles, MIDI SuperTracks, Instrumental Studies, "Songs with Vocals" Artist Performance Sets, abspielbare RealTracks Set 3, abspielbare RealDrums Set 2, zwei neue Sets von "RealDrums Stems", XPro Styles PAK & 7, Xtra Styles PAK 17 & 18, und mehr!
Paket | Was ist Neu
Band-in-a-Box® 2024 French for Mac® is Here!
Band-in-a-Box® 2024 apporte plus de 50 fonctions nouvelles ainsi qu'une importante de contenus nouveaux à savoir : 222 RealTracks, des RealStyles nouveaux, des SuperTracks MIDI, des Etudes d'Instruments, des Prestations d'Artistes, des "Morceaux avec Choeurs", un Set 3 de Tracks Jouables, un Set 2 de RealDrums Jouables, deux nouveaux Sets de "RealDrums Stems", des Styles XPro PAK 6 & 7, des Xtra Styles PAK 17 & 18, et bien plus encore!
New! XPro Styles PAK 7 for Band-in-a-Box 2024 for Mac!
We've just released XPro Styles PAK 7 with 100 brand new RealStyles, plus 50 RealTracks and RealDrums that are sure to delight!
With XPro Styles PAK 7 you can expect 25 rock & pop, 25 jazz, and 25 country styles, as well as 25 of this year's wildcard genre: Celtic!
Here's a small sampling of what XPro Styles PAK 7 has to offer: energetic rock jigs, New Orleans funk, lilting jazz waltzes, fast Celtic punk, uptempo train beats, gritty grunge, intense jazz rock, groovy EDM, soulful R&B, soft singer-songwriter pop, country blues rock, and many more!
Special Pricing! Until September 30, 2024, all the XPro Styles PAKs 1 - 7 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea)! Supercharge your Band-in-a-Box 2024® with XPro Styles PAK 7! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of XPro Styles PAKs.
Watch the XPro Styles PAK 7 Overview & Styles Demos video.
XPro Styles PAKs require Band-in-a-Box® 2024 or higher and are compatible with ANY package, including the Pro, MegaPAK, UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, and Audiophile Edition.
New! Xtra Styles PAK 18 for Band-in-a-Box 2024 for Mac!
Xtra Styles PAK 18 for Band-in-a-Box version 2024 is here with 200 brand new styles to take for a spin!
Along with 50 new styles each for the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, we’ve put together a collection of styles using sounds from the SynthMaster plugin!
In this PAK you'll find: dubby reggae grooves, rootsy Americana, LA jazz pop, driving pop rock, mellow electronica, modern jazz fusion, spacey country ballads, Motown shuffles, energetic EDM, and plenty of synth heavy grooves! Xtra Style PAK 18 features these styles and many, many more!
Special Pricing! Until September 30, 2024, all the Xtra Styles PAKs 1 - 18 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea)! Expand your Band-in-a-Box 2024® library with Xtra Styles PAK 18! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of the Xtra Styles PAK 18 here.
Watch the Xtra Styles PAK 18 Overview & Styles Demos video.
Note: The Xtra Styles require the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition of Band-in-a-Box®. (Xtra Styles PAK 18 requires the 2024 UltraPAK/UltraPAK+/Audiophile Edition. They will not work with the Pro or MegaPAK version because they need the RealTracks from the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition.
New! Xtra Styles PAK 18 for Band-in-a-Box 2024 for Windows!
Xtra Styles PAK 18 for Band-in-a-Box version 2024 is here with 200 brand new styles to take for a spin!
Along with 50 new styles each for the rock & pop, jazz, and country genres, we’ve put together a collection of styles using sounds from the SynthMaster plugin!
In this PAK you'll find: dubby reggae grooves, rootsy Americana, LA jazz pop, driving pop rock, mellow electronica, modern jazz fusion, spacey country ballads, Motown shuffles, energetic EDM, and plenty of synth heavy grooves! Xtra Style PAK 18 features these styles and many, many more!
Special Pricing! Until September 30, 2024, all the Xtra Styles PAKs 1 - 18 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea)! Expand your Band-in-a-Box 2024® library with Xtra Styles PAK 18! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of the Xtra Styles PAK 18 here.
Watch the Xtra Styles PAK 18 Overview & Styles Demos video.
Note: The Xtra Styles require the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition of Band-in-a-Box®. (Xtra Styles PAK 18 requires the 2024 UltraPAK/UltraPAK+/Audiophile Edition. They will not work with the Pro or MegaPAK version because they need the RealTracks from the UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, or Audiophile Edition.
New! XPro Styles PAK 7 for Band-in-a-Box 2024 for Windows!
We've just released XPro Styles PAK 7 with 100 brand new RealStyles, plus 50 RealTracks and RealDrums that are sure to delight!
With XPro Styles PAK 7 you can expect 25 rock & pop, 25 jazz, and 25 country styles, as well as 25 of this year's wildcard genre: Celtic!
Here's a small sampling of what XPro Styles PAK 7 has to offer: energetic rock jigs, New Orleans funk, lilting jazz waltzes, fast Celtic punk, uptempo train beats, gritty grunge, intense jazz rock, groovy EDM, soulful R&B, soft singer-songwriter pop, country blues rock, and many more!
Special Pricing! Until September 30, 2024, all the XPro Styles PAKs 1 - 7 are on sale for only $29 ea (Reg. $49 ea)! Supercharge your Band-in-a-Box 2024® with XPro Styles PAK 7! Order now!
Learn more and listen to demos of XPro Styles PAKs.
Watch the XPro Styles PAK 7 Overview & Styles Demos video.
XPro Styles PAKs require Band-in-a-Box® 2024 or higher and are compatible with ANY package, including the Pro, MegaPAK, UltraPAK, UltraPAK+, and Audiophile Edition.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Forums65
Topics83,117
Posts753,879
Members39,003
|
Most Online2,537 Jan 19th, 2020
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|